“I Wish I Could Disappear”: A Victim of Cyberbullying
She said, “I wish I could disappear”. She was the victim of cyberbullying, and one that was victimized in a way you don’t often hear about. Typically you hear of bullies web sites or instant messaging to harass their victims. Even sending emails to them. But in this situation, someone was pretending to be her and ruined her reputation in the process.
Netsmartz is site that offers information about all sorts of topics related to Internet safety. As I was browsing their site I came across video clips describing real life stories of victims of cyberbullying. In their own words, these victims tell of the horror they lived and explain how they felt so helpless.
Back to the story: she had given her password to her best friend, who then gave it to a group of popular girls in school. The hope of being accepted by this group was motivation enough to betray a dear friend.
After logging into her account, these girls sent emails containing a nude picture of their victim — only it wasn’t her. These girls had manipulated an image downloaded from a porn site and put her head on it. Sad: they know more about Photoshop than how treat others with respect.
Think about this for a minute. Can you even imagine the humiliation she must have felt when she went to school the next day? What if this was your daughter or son? All the staring going on must have been unbearable.
This isn’t something that can go away with a simple, “Oh, it really wasn’t me.” No, once it’s out on the Web, it spreads like wildfire to anyone and everyone. And it serves to inspire others to do even more damaging behavior. Sickening.
Cyberbullying is about power; it’s about feeling in control. The Internet offers anonymity like never before, and bullies find that extremely attractive. Because they can inflict harm to others without showing their face, they feel empowered to do or say things they would never dream of doing.
Parents - what can you learn from this?
- Communication between you and your child, though tough at times, is critical. This is important no matter what side of the issue you’re on: victim or victimizer. Talk to them.
- Get to know where your kids are going online and set boundaries like where they can and cannot go, or time limits for how long they can be online.
- Has your child suddenly become silent, seemed removed? Even if cyberbullying is not the case, this is a sign that parents often overlook. Go for a walk, get some ice cream — whatever, just get involved.
- Teens and adults should never give their password to anyone especially for things like email.
- If your child does receive offensive messages, or finds that their identity has been compromised, save what information you can to be used as evidence later.
- Don’t reply to offensive emails!
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